16 February 2014

Noela Nancarrow's Testimony


SALVATION & THE FAMILY TREE

The raised voices became roars. The arguing, like an aggravating itch. Suddenly, I had an urge to escape from it. It wasn't like my dad’s raging temper, physical abuse, or the loud family disagreements were uncommon. It was almost a daily occurrence. I loathed that middle kitchen cupboard where my dad kept a belt strap sitting atop a pile of newspapers, there for his easy access. I hated the big red welts that would still be there on my legs for school the next day. And I detested the fear my siblings and I lived in due to his temper. This particular evening however, I found myself retreating to my bedroom seeking calm, quietness, and blessed solitude. But I wasn't expecting this overwhelming shroud of peace to saturate me as soon as I stepped inside my room. I left the light off, not willing to disturb this incredible, palpable peace. Then as I lay down on my bed, not understanding but soaking it up nevertheless, the noise seemed to all but disappear from outside my room. Glancing toward the foot of my bed I then saw a man appear, completely in white, and as He stood there looking at me, I knew without a shadow of a doubt it was Jesus. My family and I weren’t Christians and the only religious experience I had had was limited Sunday-School when I was very young. At the time of this vision, I was 13. A barely-there teenager with a very ungodly world ahead of me. But the Prince of Peace had visited me that night, and He was keeping a close eye on me. And you know what? He is there, near to us all. We just have to reach out to Him and allow Him in.
~~~
God gave each of us a free will however, and as the years went by with no godly influences in my life, I listened to what the ‘world’ said was ‘normal’ and supposedly ‘right’. I remember feeling like there was something wrong with me if I didn’t hurry up and sleep with a guy or that you couldn’t have fun without drinking plenty of alcohol. I know now, they were all lies. How different and worse off my life could have been, but for God’s grace. He finally snared my attention through showing me what love was like in a family that knew Him. This family laughed and hugged and laughed some more, and one beautiful woman that’s now rejoicing in Heaven, played her guitar and sang with the voice of an angel. And just in case that wasn’t enough, when the television was later turned on, a documentary visualizing people’s after-life experiences of hell happened to be on. The part I saw stunned me, causing me to realize ‘there really IS a hell’. When this beautiful friend drove me home that night, she shared with me the Bible verses of Romans 10:9,10: ‘because if you confess with your lips that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For man believes with his heart and so is justified, and he confesses with his lips and so is saved.’ All of a sudden, I couldn’t wait to arrive home and as soon as I entered my room, my knees found the floor. I have never looked back. And why would I? To know God is to love Him. To love Him is abundant life, love, and happiness like you’ve never known. 
~~~
My dad is no longer with us, and I miss him so much. Forgiveness came easy to me for him. I was able to understand that he was a little slow of mind, and that he didn't have God or the ability in himself to even try to change his behavior.  My parents didn't drink alcohol thankfully, or things might have been much worse, and for that I am very grateful. But my dysfunctional childhood had without my realization, left an imprint on my character. After getting married when I was 20, I had my first child at 23 and completed our little family with 3 children by the time I was 32. I had begun changing the course of generations past by becoming a Christian and raising my children in a Christ-centered home. Having the wisdom of God available, which by the way is far superior to any man no matter how esteemed he is, I could only grow in wisdom and knowledge. It’s a journey that goes on for our lifetime, with our coach running alongside of us. Along the way God showed me I didn't need to yell at my children, I didn't need to be so angry, and I didn't need to worry so much. And so with me, and my husband, we broke the chains of our family’s legacies with God's help. We’re not perfect, but we’ve made a change for the better. Best of all, we’ve given our children the opportunity to know the Lord. And that is the most priceless gift you could ever give. I jotted down something my son wrote when he was 12 that I imagine every parent would love to hear. He said, “I feel like Peter Pan, because I don’t want to grow up. I’ve had a really happy childhood.” I couldn’t say that as a child, but I can rejoice now that Christ has brought new life to our family tree. If you have had or have a dysfunctional family, allow Jesus to restore all that’s broken and bring new life to your family tree also. God bless!
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~


51 comments:

  1. NOELA, I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes. Your anointed testimony accompanied by this beautiful song touched me so deeply. I told hubby, "Isn't it cool? You're giving life to your family tree now", as he also was brought up in a dysfunctional home. I had never heard this song before or heard "the family tree part" put quite like that, and I pray that everyone who listens to it and reads your testimony will give their life to Christ if they haven't already done so. Or rededicate their lives to Him as we sometimes find ourselves growing cold without meaning to.

    I can so totally identify with your powerful testimony as I, too, was brought up in an abusive home. And I found Christ at just about the same age as you. In the midst of all the turmoil, there He was with arms wide open and has never left my side. Although I didn't see Him physically as you did, I felt His presence and He delivered me. The answer to a question I have recently asked God is in your testimony, although it is too personal for me to share! How cool is that??

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    1. That's very cool DIANA, that He used this to answer your question! Thanks for sharing your thoughts too, beautiful... I know you had similar experience and knew you would be able to relate. Isn't it so powerful and amazing that the Creator of heaven and earth, cares about us so much and is right there supporting us even while giving us complete free will?!! Just waiting for us to come to his outstretched arms...

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  2. Awesome Testmony !!! I am so glad you came to know freedom in Jesus and His peace.
    Love and Hugs
    Linda
    faithfulacresbooks@gmail.com

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    1. Thanks LINDA, me too!!! :) Love and hugs back to ya!!

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  3. Oh, my dear Noela!!

    Like Diana, I am in tears after reading your wonderful testimony, and listening to that perfectly beautiful song that fits your testimony so "perfectly"!! I've "having church", as they say - right here in my chair at my computer!!

    I can SO identify with your testimony - the searching and experimenting teen years that for me went on well into adulthood!! I wasn't physically abused as a child, but grew up not feeling loved - hence the escape into ungodly activities/relationships. I grew up in a Christian home, and was in church every time the doors were open - but entered an entirely different world after graduating.

    How ironic that an appearance of Christ in white clothing left a wonderful feeling of peace on me as well - however, it wasn't as a child in my bedroom, but as an adult in a theatre watching a Passion Play drama/musical about the life of Christ. When the dark theatre was brightened by the stage lights coming on , and I saw Christ with arms outstretched toward me - it was if I was looking at the REAL Christ, and indeed - He was very alive in my heart right then. The posters for the Passion Play proclaimed: "Your life will be changed", and indeed it was, and will ALWAYS be - because of Him!!


    I'm SO thrilled that you've broken those "generational curses" in your family and have raised your children in a godly home!! I wish that my children had had a more godly home atmosphere as young children - but I can rejoice that my life is now an example, and the lessons from my past helped make me what I am!! PTL!!

    You have such a sweet spirit, Noela, and it SO comes across these internet pages "loud and clear", as does your light for Him!! I pray I get to meet you in person one day - THANK YOU for your beautiful words, I know they came from HIM through YOU!!

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    1. BONNIE, I'm almost in tears after reading your comment! ;) Our Lord is so beautiful, and you are so right - He gives me these words, they are not my own. And I pray that His word also goes out to serve His purposes and not return void!
      I'm so grateful that you have come back to God fully and are allowing your light to shine so brightly... You are a real blessing to so many people - and I would absolutely love to meet you one day too!! Isn't it wonderful that He can use all our mistakes etc for good too?!

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  4. This is awesome! It is also very well written, I got goosebumps.
    I was saved at 13, and although we were not a dysfunctional family, Jesus wasn't as big a part of our family as he could be.
    *Abigail

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    1. Thanks ABIGAIL, I'm so grateful to have this opportunity to share, and to bring praise to His name. Getting saved at 13 is GREAT... right before those dreaded teenage years, lol. It sounds like your family tree is also going in a better/stronger direction. God bless!

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  5. Very touching Noella. I'm sorry about the abuse, but so glad you found Jesus and ask Him into your life. And, that you're raising your family in a Christian home. I was a lucky one. I was blessed to be raised in a loving, Christian home. And, my parents lived their faith. But, I did get spanked a few times with a razor strap but never when daddy was mad., but later and we knew it was coming for our disobedience. The waiting hurt more than the spanking. I was a pretty good kid so didn't get many. Most times I minded and didn't do what I knew not to do. But, there was never a time when I ever felt abused or unloved. And, they never fussed at each other in front of us kids. In fact, he told my mother once to not ever spank us while she was mad, but wait until she had calmed down. (this came from her telling). But, we knew where the boundaries were and all 8 of us grew to be upstanding citizens and loving parents. Wish it were that way for all children. Beautiful music while also sad. God bless you. Love you bunches. Maxie

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    1. Thank you so much for sharing your beautiful response MAXIE ~ What an absolutely inspiring lady you are, and what a treasured family you have!! A very wise dad of yours to not spank while mad. I know that my dad found it hard to stop because he was doing it in anger. Never a good idea. And he never needed much of a reason either, I remember he exploded once because of a bit of paper on the floor. But praise God that is in the past now, and I prefer to think of him how he was when he was much older. When he was still with us, we'd visit him in the nursing home and his face would just light up, and he'd laugh and smile, even get a tear in his eye. Those are good memories.
      Love YOU heaps too Maxie, thanks for being such a sweetheart and a blessing to us all here!

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  6. Wow, what a powerful testimony, Noela. I am so glad that the Prince of Peace came to you in person!!! And so glad you accepted Him as Lord and Saviour and turned your life over to Him!!! How awful that you had to suffer as you did as a child and teen. And PTL you haven't let the toxins of that dysfunctional family seep into your own household! Sending love n hugs your way, sweet Aussie Angel!!!

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    1. CARRIE, you know I didn't even understand the significance of the peace that saturated my room that evening, until a christian friend I had made at 19 yrs, upon hearing my testimony told me that the Prince of Peace is one of Jesus' names!! I thought that was SO cool then! :)
      I have had to fight against some of those childhood imprints, but I had learnt a better way to be AND most importantly, God gave me the help I needed to do so. It is just too hard to do these things on your own without any help. So grateful for Him, and so grateful for you too Carrie - for being part of His plan for my life. Love and big hugs to you!!

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  7. Stirring testimony, Noela. Thank you for sharing your pain and your amazing story. God truly can break the bondage of the past. Praise God!

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    1. That He can!! :) Thanks ELAINE, and I'm so glad I could share this with you and everybody. Praise to Him!

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  8. Oh my sweet sweet sissy, I am sitting here crying at all you had to go through as a child, but what an amazing testimony you have because of it. Our GOD is an awesome GOD, He saw everything you were going through and He saw how many people around the world that are going to be blest by the testimony you have now because of it.

    I was spanked as a kid but I knew it was never because my parents were taking out their frustrations on me, it was because of my disobedience. My dad only spanked me once, mom took care of it,,,she never waited on Dad to come home. :-)

    Thank you so much for sharing with us, I know it had to be hard bringing up those old memories. My goodness did you give Matthew West your testimony? That song is a perfect match and it also brought tears to my eyes. How did you find it?

    I am so Grateful to GOD that he placed you in my life and one day I hope I'll be able to give you a {{big hug}} in person.

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    1. It still touches me today SISSY, that He visited me at that time in my life. How He loves us all and as I wrote in the testimony, He is near to us all, loving us and longing for us to come to Him!!
      Matthew West's amazing songs inspire me all the time, but I although I placed a link to OWG on his page, I don't know whether he would actually see it. :) I hope everyone who hasn't heard his music before is inspired to check out more of his music as it moves and motivates me like none other!!
      I love you too TERESA (my adopted Sissy) and I thank God for you!! HUGS to you!!

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  9. Noela, So moved by your testimony which is beautifully written and comes straight from your heart to ours. You really have a gift for words, shining light on the fact that Christ is the ultimate HEALER and breaker of chains. Truly, He sets us free and I'm so thankful you found that early on and your family is leaving a godly legacy. The song is a lovely echo of your life, yes. Blessings on you and yours. I know you touch many by your very caring, faithful spirit, myself included! I give thanks for you every day.

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    1. Aww thank you lovely LAURA... I give thanks for you too always!! God gives guidance to my words, but your beautiful stories give inspiration to my writing! And I love how you wrote how He is the ultimate healer and breaker of chains. So very, very true! So glad you could come by Laura.. "A lovely echo of your life" - love your words!! :)

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  10. Thank you for sharing your testimony, dear Noella. What a blessing your words are to me. I'm so happy that you and your husband have taken your early lessons to heart, and are gifting your children with happy childhoods. xo

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    1. Thank you so much for stopping by OWG to read my testimony, ANN! You are so sweet... I'm so grateful to know you Ann, and am happy that my words have blessed you. And I'm forever grateful to God for changing the direction of my life and giving me, our children, and future generations, the opportunity to live for Him! :) PTL!

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  11. Noella, thank you so much for sharing your testimony. I'm so thankful those sad days are behind you, and you have such a wonderful future to look forward to with the Lord.

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    1. I am too CHRISTINE, and I really am beyond grateful to the Lord for giving me this life that's so full of His indescribable love, and the treasured friends I've made along the way too, including you! Bless you!

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  12. Noela, I'm stunned by how beautifully you brought your testimony full circle--from a heartbreaking beginning to a miraculous new beginning filled with love and hope. This glimpse into what made you who you are today is positively anointed with a sense of peace. The amazing part is how lovely you have become after trusting God, despite the fear and pain of your childhood. The investment of love He made into your life has brought so much to you and your children. And just think, it will continue in the next generation, beginning with your precious little grandson. Your account of the enemies assault against your young life brings to mind the words in Genesis 50:20 "As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result, to preserve many people alive." Awesome testimony!

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    1. Dear MARCIA, you always have such a beautiful and amazing way with words!! Thank you so much sweet friend for coming by to read and share. You know, whenever I think of my daughter and her budding family, I am grateful all over again for what God has done in our lives... and is still continuing to do! Seeing that precious grandson of ours being raised in a home filled with love and faith... that is the best gift ever! Fantastic scripture too Marcia, thanks so much for sharing that. Love you!

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  13. You and I have talked about your childhood many times over the years, but your testimony still brings a tear to my eye to this day. In a world where "the sins of the father" are so obviously visited upon future generations, with God's help, and a lot of strength and determination from you, you changed the course of your family. I saw the love and time and effort your poured into your children through the years, and the patience with which you taught them. I'm very glad that God placed you in my life, I'm honoured to be your friend. :)

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    1. So cool to see you here on OWG, JENNY, but what's even "cooler" is how God brought us together!! How great was it to have that support with each other having children with Asperger's, especially as they were growing up? Just one of the amazing things that God does when we give our life over to Him... is fitting the jigsaw pieces of our lives together so that you can get a more vibrant and flowing picture.. Honored to be your friend also Jen. xx

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  14. I love you Mum! Such a beautiful testimony...
    It was great to read that as an adult and as a mother because it has taken on new meaning to me now. I can appreciate it in a whole new light!

    Beautifully written, as always...

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    1. As I wrote underneath Marcia's comment, RACHEL, whenever I think of your precious little family, I thank God all over again!!! I'm soooo proud of you, of who you are as a Christian, a mother and wife, and a daughter! Thank you for your sweet words. I love you!!

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  15. And I'm blessed that the curse is gone over our family and each generation gets to reap the benefit of your salvation.

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    1. Amen!! Unless they are a mother, I'm not sure if people can truly understand what a relief and joy it is to know that your children love God and will be raising their children up to also know and love our amazing Creator, friend, and God! :)

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  16. Noela,
    Wow! Amen! God sure answers prayers. Loved reading your testimony. Thanks for sharing. Hugs

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    1. Hey DANIE, I'm so glad you've signed up for OWG newsletters! :) I'm a bit slow in getting the posts up in Pinterest sometimes so I'm so glad you made it here. And blessed that you enjoyed reading the testimony. Hugs back Danie!!

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  17. NOELA, thank you for sharing your beautifully written, moving testimony with us! When I first read it, I was in tears--tears for what you had to endure growing up and tears of happiness that you found the Lord. This testimony is blessed and it is great to read the comments and see how it touched the hearts of the readers.
    Bless you!

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    1. MARIAN, thanks so much for your help in putting the video up, and being my reader and final editor too!! :) It blesses me that this testimony has touched you and so many others. That's been my prayer. Bless you Dutchy, and big hugs to you and Jessie!!

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  18. Noela, Thanks so much for sharing your testimony with us. The Lord be praised that you were able to forgive your dad and have a relationship with him.

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    1. You're welcome ANNE, I will admit it is a little confronting putting out a personal testimony, but over-riding that was my passion and desire to see my story (and everyone's) do what I think they're meant to do, and that is, to inspire others and sow seeds of faith! As I said in another reply, that's my prayer anyway! :)

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  19. Noela, I was stunned and saddened by your story. But then I was elated at the ending! I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that as a child. I wasn't abused but I had no father and an alcoholic mom. And, like you, I got involved with some bad things in my teens (and my 20's). Praise God, He never gives up on us!! He pursues us until we turn and run into his arms! And He always gives a happy ending! Thank you for sharing such personal things. I KNOW your story will bless others and help bring some of them back to their Heavenly Father's arms. Hugs and love to you!!

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    1. MARYLU... YES, isn't it wonderful how He never gives up on us!! Always pursuing us, loving us, and waiting patiently for us to turn into His arms! How I love Him!! Thank you so much for coming by to comment, you are such a blessing MaryLu, and I do LOVE your words of affirmation about the testimony. Big hugs and love back!!

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  20. WOW, Noela, POWERFUL testimony, and like many of the comments expressed above, both your beautifully written words and the video tugged tears from my eyes!

    You know, as Christian bloggers, writers, and authors we forge many friendships with kind and tender-hearted people like yourself, believers who smile and encourage and shine brightly for Jesus. But it's not until we hear the testimonies behind those smiles that we fully understand the incredible extent of God's grace, mercy, and love. My heart rejoices over His faithfulness in your life, Noela, and the beautiful person He has given me -- and all of us -- as a dear friend.

    Like so many of us, I was abused by a father who used his belt as well, along with his shoe and a cat-of-nine-tails, but looking back I see God's loving touch over and over and, in fact, was just reflecting on those touches this morning in my prayer time. He truly never leaves us nor forsakes us, always in the wings, loving us and drawing us near. Relentless in His unfailing love and mercy. :)

    Thanks for sharing this touch of God in your life -- in addition to warm chills, it gives each of us even more hope and joy.

    Hugs,
    Julie

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    1. Thank you dear JULIE, for your very touching comments, insights, and honest sharing. I would never have imagined you had gone through all of that either... a cat-of-nine-tails just sounds horrific to use on anyone let alone a child! I'm so grateful He brought you through all of that also... And I think it's so true that God has used these 'bad things' in our lives for good... All of it helping to make us who we are today.
      Thank you for your precious friendship Julie. You know it just blesses me so much when I think of all you must have gone through too, and then to see the beautiful, fun, warm, and loving person that you are today!! I just praise God for you, and for all He does in people's lives when they turn to Him! Love & Hugs always!!

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  21. Such a beautifully written, wonderful testimony of God's love and faithfulness! Thank you so much for sharing your heart. It is such an encouragement to hear how God has worked in your life, healed your pain and been there for you! I'm blessed to know you, Noela!

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    1. You're so sweet JAMIE, I feel blessed to know you also. So glad we have been able to connect through FB!
      God is indeed faithful and very loving!! It always bothers me when people attribute the evil in this world to God or God's supposed lack of love and power, when it hurts Him more than it does us!! But He remains faithful to us all nevertheless, all the while giving us our free will, but longing for our love!
      Hugs & Blessings, Jamie!!

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  22. Thanks for sharing your story, Noela. You are a true inspiration....hugs!

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    1. You're more than welcome DEBBIE, and I'm so very grateful it has been able to inspire people. I know some people have been through much worse, but through it all, God is there for each and every one of us. I know it hurts Him as much as it does us..
      Debbie, you are such a sweet, giving person, and an inspiration to so many also. Thank you for being you!!

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  23. Noela--thank you for sharing your testimony. God did such a mighty thing in your life and brought you from a very difficult time to a wonderful legacy for you and your family. Isn't it great to know that we serve a mighty, and everlasting God who can provide miracles for us. It is such a pleasure to walk along His side, knowing that He is always there for us. You did a wonderful job of writing and sharing a personal time in your life.
    Vicki

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    1. VICKI, thank you so much for your kind words and encouragement!! And oh yeah, we sure do serve a mighty and powerful God!!! ALL who know God personally can attest to that for sure! And even more incredible and beautiful than His power and miracles, is that indescribable love of His that is there with us as He walks alongside of us... Ready to give us His comfort and strength should we ask for it. Bless you Vicki!

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  24. I forgot to mention--I LOVED the beautiful song that you posted with your testimony--it went along with your testimony, so beautifully as if it was written for you! I hope that this song continues to bless you and others who have experienced the same thing & I hope the author, DOES get a chance to read your testimony as well...
    Vicki

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    1. SO glad to hear you enjoyed Matthew's song 'Family Tree', VICKI!! Matthew West wrote that very song to encourage people who have or have had dysfunctional families. I pray his song will also continue to bless people in that situation! I absolutely love all of Matthew's music... He's a man with a real heart after God and uses his music to reach out and touch others, to encourage and inspire! And in God's amazing plan... What does MW do, but release a couple of albums that are all about "overcoming with God"!! Co-incidence... I think not! ;)

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  25. Beautiful testimony.......God bless you
    Chris Granville

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    1. Thank you CHRIS and may the Lord bless you too! Actually I see on our list of prize-winners, you were indeed blessed recently with a copy of Pam Hillman's 'Stealing Jake'!!! How exciting, you are going to absolutely LOVE that story Chris!

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  26. So beautiful, Noela. A story of God's redemption and breaking the cycle of abuse. Thanks for sharing and for being a blessing. xx

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