Showing posts with label unforgiveness. Show all posts
Showing posts with label unforgiveness. Show all posts

11 August 2013

Carol Urton Guest Post


Carol Urton

Carol Urton Guest Post

When Carrie asked me to do a guest post on Overcoming With God about a topic in my book, I was overwhelmed. How can I pick just one topic? I decided on one area most people struggle with when dealing with hurts from their past. Numerous people tell me the thing that has a stronghold on their lives is the ability to forgive the person, or people, who hurt them.

I was abandoned at age two by my father. Shortly after, I was thrust into a life of unrelenting sexual abuse and child pornography when my mother remarried a deacon in our local church. After nine years I finally brought this dark family secret into light, only to be silenced and sent away to live with my grandparents. At age 14 I began the journey of trying to find peace among the shattered pieces of my life.

After years of running from the truth, I had to face my past.  I began to try and answer my biggest question. ”Where Was God?” But there wasn’t an easy answer to that question and the abandonment I felt from God was not easily solved.  But I knew I had to make a choice, I had to choose life and I had to make a choice to be free. And it is a choice to begin a process of recovery, not a quick fix. Through this process was the realization that in order to truly be free, I had to forgive. I had a lot to learn about forgiveness. Here are a few questions I battled with and the short version of the answers God gave me:
What if the person is not sorry? Forgiveness does not always mean reconciliation. The people in my life that hurt me never did acknowledge any harm done, nor did they ever say they were sorry.

What if I don’t feel forgiveness in my heart? Take a step and do it anyway. Feelings come and go, God tells us to forgive . . . He will take care of the rest.

What if the other person does not accept your forgiveness? After my well thought out speech I gave the person who did the most damage in my life, he simply replied, “Tough break for you kid.”
What if I still feel angry after I forgive? Forgiveness is not an instant remedy. I had to ask God to help me forgive, time after time after time.

The people I forgave are all still the same today as they were yesterday. But I am growing and I am living in the wonderful grace of God. I finally had to realize that if I didn’t forgive, if I was going to wait for the debt they owed me to be repaid, I would be tied to them forever. Once I forgave their debts, no matter how underserving they were, I cut the tie that kept us bound together. What did taking this life-changing step do for me? It set me FREE.

Carol Urton is an Author and national lecturer. She has been invited to speak at numerous conferences, workshops and retreats. She has been a featured guest on several radio and television programs. Her long awaited book, "Where is God? When Hope Hurts" was released in January 2013.
www.carolurton.wordpress.com

Giveaway:  Carol is giving away a copy of her book to one of our readers.  Please leave a comment and your email address to enter.


11 May 2013

Review of MaryLu Tyndall's "Forsaken Dreams" and Upcoming Week Notification


Forsaken Dreams

Barbour, 2013

Forsaken Dreams is a unique and engaging story. Characterization is exceptional. Lots of characters and subplots to engage the reader. Love that!

Who’d have ever thought that Southerners headed to Brazil after the Civil War? Great premise for a story, based on facts. Although much of the story takes place aboard ship, it doesn't feel like one is adrift in the story.

Eliza (love that name as it was my grandmother's!) was a southerner who married a Yankee general when she was very young. Blake is an injured Confederate colonel whose unforgiveness threatens to destroy him, his faith, and his chance for love. The story is full of characters, many of whom get a point of view in the story telling, including an alcoholic Southern belle who is a hoot.  All the characters seem to have secrets!

I read this book in paperback and the cover is so GORGEOUS that I recommend the paperback rather than Kindle version! The print was good, too. Sometimes publishers don’t have nice clear dark ink print on paperbacks or use paper that glares and that makes it harder for some people, like me, to read a paperback easily.

This book will be on my list for Recommended Spring/Summer Reads post next week!

This book may be purchased through Amazon, CBD, and your local bookstores. Please support this wonderful author by purchasing and reviewing her books. 

Next week:  The OWG reviewers will be posting our recommended reads.  On MONDAY we will be having an ANNIVERSARY PARTY for DIANA!!! It is her TWO YEAR anniversary on OWG and we will party down!

Giveaway: Copy of MaryLu’s Forsaken Dreams to someone who has read and reviewed (such as on Amazon) at least one of her previous books (put RR on your comment), Likes her GoodReads page (put GR) on there, and has liked her Author Facebook page (FB).  I am hoping for someone who meets ALL of those criteria but put up what you have done just in case we don’t.  

17 June 2012

Happy Father's Day!

Commentary on Relationships
By Carrie Fancett Pagels


In our Dan Walsh week, Dan shared about broken relationships being one of the most difficult things he has overcome. That despite him having been horribly sick and hospitalized near Christmastime.  There are things that make us sick and situations that make us heart sick.  Being our of fellowship with each other, and particularly with our parents, is not biblical.  


I want to encourage any readers today who are harboring unforgiveness against their fathers to let that go.  Ask God to remove the hurt and pain.  Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting. An abusive parent, still living, may still be abusive.  Forgiving does not mean you need to be around them.  But you do need to follow biblical guidelines about how we are to treat our parents with respect.  You can be respectful in a way that doesn't allow the abuse to continue. (I am speaking of adults who no longer live with their parents.) Get in the Word and pray about what God would have you do to show your respect toward your father without being a target or a doormat.  


Many people who suffered insults from their fathers have married Christian men who are wonderful fathers to their own children. What a blessing! 


Dear Father God, our ultimate Father, we ask you to remove the hurts of earthly fathers.  And we thank you for the wonderful godly earthly fathers out there.  May you bless them and their families.  
In Jesus's name, Amen.


HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!

14 January 2012

Weekly Review: The Conundrum of Shame




Sarah Sundin's latest release Blue Skies Tomorrow (Revell, 2011) is available in hard cover large print, paperback and kindle through Amazon and through Christian Book Distributors and others such as Barnes and Noble. 

Sarah Sundin's interview earlier in the week touched on shame and its consequences.  While the spirit may convict us of wrong doing we know from God's Word that once we have confessed our sins He forgives us. It is the enemy who comes after us with taunts and accusations - him and his minions.  When someone waves a forgiven offense in front of your face, turn to your Father and He'll help remove the stench.  Recollection or memory of wrong doing is not the same as not forgiving ones' self. When we remember we can might be more aware of stepping into that temptation or situation again.


Here is a link to an article about overcoming shame that is written for Christians:
http://www.ruachministries.org/Talks/A_Pilgrim's_Guide_to_Overcoming_Shame.htm


I like the title of Sarah's latest book.  God can give us Blue Skis Tomorrow and we don't need to bring our rain and clouds from yesterdays with us. He gives us a clean slate as far as the east is from the west - we are forgiven.  The enemy will bring his own darts of lightening to throw at us. Let us NOT add to the problem by raining down shame on ourselves! His grace really is sufficient.


How about you?  What have you done to turn your own unforgiveness of yourself over to God? 


GIVEAWAY: Leave a comment for a chance to win this newest release or another of Sarah's books including her upcoming 2012 publication "With Every Letter" now available for pre-order through CBD!


May God bless and heal the hearts and minds of our visitors today!

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