tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post2494094200746937397..comments2023-10-21T07:52:07.859-04:00Comments on Overcoming With God: Overcoming the Tendency to Compare -- By Tamera AlexanderCarrie Fancett Pagelshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09096954464239963966noreply@blogger.comBlogger38125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-74689913541976645822015-06-01T22:03:45.505-04:002015-06-01T22:03:45.505-04:00Well I did write something but it disappeared! Grr...Well I did write something but it disappeared! Grrr I cannot find it! <br /><br />This is a great post, Tamera! I am going to try and remember all I wrote. And then try to write it again! I think I'm going to copy what I wrote before trying to publish it. <br /><br />I do remember saying something about where we need to seek Him more instead of comparing or judging ourselves to others. It is so easy to do in today's world. That's all I remember. <br /><br />Please don't enter me in the contest. I have the books on my Kindle.Reginahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16254075856217132287noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-64260435404652332092015-06-01T20:33:06.762-04:002015-06-01T20:33:06.762-04:00It's generally when I fall short of my own exp...It's generally when I fall short of my own expectations (which are far higher than that of anyone else for me), that I will fall into the comparing trap. Half the time I'm not even comparing with someone else--I [stupidly] compare my end product with what I think it ought to have been. It's definitely something to work on. [sigh]Rachael Khttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08235781577625847862noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-4392783323860467762015-06-01T20:14:17.958-04:002015-06-01T20:14:17.958-04:00Oh pls forgive my terrible error re your book titl...Oh pls forgive my terrible error re your book title! To Win Her Favor, everybody, is the correct name!! Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15368483978360906629noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-91117897056421968752015-06-01T19:58:26.627-04:002015-06-01T19:58:26.627-04:00Thanks so much for visiting with us this week, Tam...Thanks so much for visiting with us this week, Tamera, and sharing this guest post. I think for me the hard part is wanting to know how well my books are doing and part of that is looking at rankings. And also, with proposals, authors are asked to compare their writing to other authors'. As a psychologist for 25 years I've seen how harmful it can be to compare yourself to others -- and God doesn't like it either. Life's so short and we each have our own missions to focus on.Carrie Fancett Pagelshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09096954464239963966noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-2318067004101271032015-06-01T18:57:12.370-04:002015-06-01T18:57:12.370-04:00Hi Tamera, great post! Thanks for sharing your hea...Hi Tamera, great post! Thanks for sharing your heart and at times for me is is really hard to watch those around me have success but I have to keep reminding myself that I'm on my own journey and no one else can travel that road. I have to keep reminding myself of that over and over! :)Jesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05126018825779210662noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-45631368778669103112015-06-01T17:59:43.933-04:002015-06-01T17:59:43.933-04:00Thanks, Tamera for this interview which was very i...Thanks, Tamera for this interview which was very interesting and I appreciate your references to Scripture. I seldom revert to comparing myself to others, although I do on occasion when one of our Sisters gets an award or acclamation. At those times I have to tell myself that what I do is important and that I , like you, am doing God's will for me, and no one can do the ministry that I do with the elderly. Thanks for this wonderful contest. I loved your book "A Beauty So Rare" and sure would love to win this book as well. Sincerely, Mary Lou K I shared on Facebook and Twitter and tried to share on google.Mary Louhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15819901920964640591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-16993557530447838272015-06-01T17:14:53.539-04:002015-06-01T17:14:53.539-04:00So agree, Patty. Now that I'm in my 50s, I'...So agree, Patty. Now that I'm in my 50s, I'm much more comfortable in my own skin, as they say. I know me. I know who I am—and who I'll never be. All things are possible with Christ, but "all things" is not necessarily what Christ has in mind for me. So best to follow his lead and keep in step with him. Hugs, friend, and thanks for sharing.Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-84552299536869461532015-06-01T17:13:00.447-04:002015-06-01T17:13:00.447-04:00So true what you wrote: "...only to find out ...So true what you wrote: "...only to find out I wouldn't want her life at all once I find out more! We never know what another person is going through sometimes." Oh yes! Be careful what we pray and wish for! God knows best what we need and He's the giver of joy. And pain. Whatever our souls require to be drawn closer to him. Thanks for sharing! Appreciate you and how you use your gifts for him.Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-36452574706094672142015-06-01T17:08:39.827-04:002015-06-01T17:08:39.827-04:00Maxie, I sooo relate to what you said here "B...Maxie, I sooo relate to what you said here "But at the same time, I'm thankful to GOD that I have it (the car)." So true. I constantly ask God to make me more grateful—and he does. Sometimes in painful ways. But I truly believe the root of so much of our discontent (with ourselves, our spouses, our lives, our careers) is because we're not grateful enough. We take too much for granted. I know I do. Praying for you now, and asking God to encourage your heart and soul, friend. Thanks for sharing.Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-68255041003248508462015-06-01T17:06:11.035-04:002015-06-01T17:06:11.035-04:00Praying for you now, Tammy. Through Christ we are ...Praying for you now, Tammy. Through Christ we are more than conquerers, and he'll enable you (His power, not yours, not mine) will overcome this tendency to compare. Just watch him work in your life! Love from Nashville...Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-25267327396690257072015-06-01T17:04:44.817-04:002015-06-01T17:04:44.817-04:00I certainly will, Noela. And I'll link to you ...I certainly will, Noela. And I'll link to you too. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and experiences. We can all relate! Hugs, friend. Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-70015520919324851042015-06-01T17:03:29.841-04:002015-06-01T17:03:29.841-04:00Agree, Mary. Bless you for sharing.Agree, Mary. Bless you for sharing.Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-45969990244497916312015-06-01T17:03:06.403-04:002015-06-01T17:03:06.403-04:00Amen, Betti. Thanks for sharing!Amen, Betti. Thanks for sharing!Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-31885410095640625052015-06-01T17:02:43.703-04:002015-06-01T17:02:43.703-04:00There's a scene in TO WIN HER FAVOR when Maggi...There's a scene in TO WIN HER FAVOR when Maggie, the heroine, contemplates the same thoughts you share, Susan. And I found my own life lessons and struggles mirrored in that scene. It's a daily battle. But we can be victorious through the strength of Christ. My own strength falters and fails but his never does. Better for us to rely on his endless power supply instead of our own weak one (that's a daily reminder for me too). Hugs!Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-58001686719053579062015-06-01T16:59:42.819-04:002015-06-01T16:59:42.819-04:00Amen, Karen. So well said. He's the potter, we...Amen, Karen. So well said. He's the potter, we're the clay. And we're all cracked pots (and Patsy Clairmont is fond of saying!). Much love, friend.Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-16437377569172222892015-06-01T16:58:50.222-04:002015-06-01T16:58:50.222-04:00Thank you, Trixi, for sharing your heart. And for ...Thank you, Trixi, for sharing your heart. And for doing it so beautifully. I love I Cor 12 when God talks about the body of Christ. We all need each other and everyone has their role to play. Different roles, but all vital to the kingdom. Bless you!Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-4549094589680788972015-06-01T16:45:37.702-04:002015-06-01T16:45:37.702-04:00Something else I learned long ago is that God is t...Something else I learned long ago is that God is the best publicist and marketer. Yes, we need to do "our part" (as he leads us to do, each in her own way) but he will get your book (and mine) into the hands of those who need to read it. Not that they'll all like it (hard as that can be to understand, LOL!). But our goal is to glorify him and to write the story he puts on your heart. Something else I recommend, Sue, don't read your online reviews. I encourage readers to post them because they're so needed these days (and can be all over the map because everyone has an opinion). But I also tell them that if they want me to read them, to please send them to me. Most do, and I respond (though it takes time to answer back). That advice was for free. Take or toss! :)Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-50645629700227218482015-06-01T16:42:06.147-04:002015-06-01T16:42:06.147-04:00Thanks for sharing, Tina! Hugging you from Nashvil...Thanks for sharing, Tina! Hugging you from Nashville—and thank you for those kind words!Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-22763142050311598542015-06-01T16:41:18.546-04:002015-06-01T16:41:18.546-04:00Praying for you right this minute, Caryl, and aski...Praying for you right this minute, Caryl, and asking God to show you what you look like robed in the beauty and sinlessness of Christ. You're one gorgeous daughter of the King, woman! Appreciate you sharing.Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-58923712328983080262015-06-01T16:39:05.014-04:002015-06-01T16:39:05.014-04:00LOL, Bonnie. No worries! As a preacher friend of m...LOL, Bonnie. No worries! As a preacher friend of mine used to say, "the ground at the foot of the cross is level." We're all rotten sinners redeemed by the blood of Christ, and by nothing else. Loved what you shared, and appreciate the heart with which you shared it. Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-17932083848462380202015-06-01T16:36:07.919-04:002015-06-01T16:36:07.919-04:00Amen to wishing I'd learned this earlier too, ...Amen to wishing I'd learned this earlier too, Sherry. It's so freeing! You're free to be the writer God has fashioned you to be, which also "frees" you to write your book for an Audience of One. For him. Yes, we want others to read it and hopefully enjoy it (or love it!), but ultimately... It's about pleasing him and bringing him glory through our words. Tamera Alexanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04072249069210250570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-13842502793658595452015-06-01T16:35:20.254-04:002015-06-01T16:35:20.254-04:00P.S. Just realized the title of Tamera's novel...P.S. Just realized the title of Tamera's novel is "TO WIN HER FAVOR" rather than To Win Her Heart. Sorry, Tamera!! Bonnie Roofnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-66031154416628915622015-06-01T16:05:27.566-04:002015-06-01T16:05:27.566-04:00I think women have a much greater tendency to comp...I think women have a much greater tendency to compare themselves with others. As I have gotten older it has gotten less, but still have to squelch those tendencies! Pattyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08047478982437818328noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-16881983097913288782015-06-01T12:01:44.400-04:002015-06-01T12:01:44.400-04:00Thank you so much for being with us this week on O...Thank you so much for being with us this week on OWG, TAMARA! I have loved your books since forever! What an insightful, wisdom-filled post! Us women are very bad about comparing. I love what you said about envy leaving one empty, brooding, and bitter. I have never looked at it quite like that before. How many times have I envied a neighbor/church friend who seemed to have it all, only to find out I wouldn't want her life at all once I find out more! We never know what another person is going through sometimes. <br /><br />Yes, I do compare my reviews with Noela's (above) and mine always come up lacking. lol So I have learned not to read hers first or I will really have a struggle writing mine! But I'm envious in a good way -- happy that God has blessed her with such great writing talent! And thankful He has blessed me to write also, albeit a different style than others. Now how not to be envious of the lady down the street with the good figure and all her energy! haha I'm a work in progress.Diana Flowershttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17127629740742628849noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8713519582170578996.post-91894724515057562372015-06-01T03:15:35.485-04:002015-06-01T03:15:35.485-04:00Hello Tamera. Nice post you have for us. I think ...Hello Tamera. Nice post you have for us. I think this has been a problem with all at some point in their life. I know I have said things like wishIng my hair could be curly when others I know have such pretty curly hair. But I always need to roll my hair.. Next thing I know they are wanting straight hair. They use those straightening irons. Crazy how no one seems satisfied. And, I often wish I could be as healthy as some of my friends. But then I realize that they may have lots of hurts too. And, most of those who can still do so much has always been active people and then I realize I wished I had been more active too. I think that is a big part of staying healthy, unless it's bad things like cancer, etc. One thing I think is that I'm happy without a lot of new things. I don't need new furniture as long as what I have is still good. I have a roof, tho a leaky one, over my head, food to eat, clothes to wear, and a car that will get me to where I need to go. I must admit to wishing my car was better for I'm always worried about trouble on the streets. But, at the same time thankful to GOD that I have it. And, tho I hurt a lot, I can still do most of what I need to do, and when I complain I also tell GOD I'm thankful it isn't worse for it is for many. I loved your post and would love to win your book. And, will try to not wish I could still do some things others can do healthwise. GOD bless you all.<br /> Maxie > mac262(at)me(dot)com <Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com