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Vicki And Jon Marney In Front Of The Leela Palace In India |
Learning to Lean on God—A Survivor's Story
Sunday, November 27, 1994—Church and
the Perplexing Message: I stayed home with our oldest teen-age daughter
who was going through a rebellious stage and had refused to go to church.
However, my husband Jon attended, and he had an experience entirely unique in
his life.
Here is what he told me later that day: During the service, our pastor had
requested that those who needed prayer should come forward. At that point, Jon
had a strong impression that there was someone that had a serious problem,
'like maybe cancer or something' and needed prayer. The impression was very
clear that God knew about the problem and that it was going to be okay. In
addition, the message was that God would be with them through the problem, not
around it. Then Jon saw what he described as a vision of something like an
X-ray with a large, uneven-edged dark splotch. He felt like God wanted him to
share it, but there was an equal impression that the person did not know they
had a problem. So then, there was an obvious dilemma—if someone did not know
they had a problem, how would they know they needed to go forward for prayer?
With this apparent contradiction, he did not feel he could say anything—it just
did not make sense. Meanwhile, among those that had come forward was a woman
named Lydia. The pastor told the congregation that Lydia had previously found a
lump in her breast and was going in for a biopsy and was requesting prayer that
everything would turn out okay. Jon thought, Oh, that is who this message was for. Yet this impression was so
strong and so unusual, he still felt he needed to tell someone. So then, after
the service ended, Jon told another of our daughters—also a teen—and then told
the pastor. After Jon came home, he also told me and expressed his confusion
about how strange it was to have a feeling that God had a message for someone,
but that the person did not know they needed to hear it.
November 29, 1994—Mammogram and a BB: Our insurance coverage was about to end,
so I had scheduled a routine physical exam. During the exam, my doctor
performed a breast exam and also suggested that I have my first
mammogram: “because you are 40, so you might as well have a baseline
done." So there I was, on the 29th, enjoying
a ‘smashing’ experience. After doing the initial X-rays, the
technician returned and taped a BB on my left breast and took several more
X-rays. A little while later, she came back with a radiologist who told me they
had found a suspicious spot and asked if he could examine me. After he examined
me, he showed me where to feel for a lump. It took a bit—because it was not
close to the surface—but when I found it, I realized it was nearly the size of
a walnut.
The
radiologist advised me to have a biopsy done. I told him that there was a
problem—our insurance was ending at the end of the month. He said, "Well,
then we better get it done before the end of the month." I didn't realize
at that point that the end of the month was the next day! So, all of the
planning was rushed: I spent the rest of the afternoon at a surgeon's office,
at the hospital having pre-op X-rays and having a full set of blood work done.
I was feeling very overwhelmed doing all of this alone. I only had time to make
a phone call to my husband alerting him of what was going on, so he could
arrange to go with me to the hospital for my surgery. They had me in surgery
the next afternoon!
November
30, 1994—A lump in my throat and another in my breast: The morning before my
surgery was our ladies Bible Study, so I was able to attend before going to the
hospital. I was feeling very nervous because I had never been in the hospital
for anything except the birth of my first child—the other four were home
births. The ladies at the Bible study prayed over me before I went to the
hospital, which helped to calm my nerves a bit. One of the ladies prayed that
it would turn out to be nothing, but all along, both Jon and I felt this was
going to be one of those times that God was going to ‘carry us through’ not ‘remove’ or ‘help
us around’.
After my surgery, Jon was waiting for me to wake from the anesthesia, when he
told me what my surgeon had said: "I have been doing this for a long time,
and you get so you can recognize when it is cancer, and I am very sure that
this IS cancer—of course we will have to wait for the biopsy to come back, but
I am pretty sure this is cancer." After Jon told me this, I said,
"Jon! That message was not for Lydia, it was for me! Lydia didn't have
cancer, but I DO! The message was for us!"
Because of
the message that God had given to Jon for us, I never experienced the ‘why me?’
or, ‘oh no—I'm going die!’ But instead, ‘Oh no! We don't have any insurance
anymore—how are we going to pay for this?’ God had already told us that He
knew, before we even imagined there was a problem, and He had told us that it
was going to be okay—we just had to trust Him. My thoughts were occupied with ‘Oh
dear, is this going to involve a lot of pain and vomiting?’ (I'm a wimp when it
comes to pain and I hate vomiting) and, ‘What am I going to have to go through—to
get to the 'other side' of this—to get to being okay again?’ We had a year
ahead of us to learn to trust God fully.
Please be sure and return to read my testimony of Overcoming Breast Cancer—Part II, when I will share thoughts about chemotherapy, radiation, and having
less hair than my husband! I will also provide a link for meaningful suggestions for
friends and family supporting a loved one going through a life-threatening or
chronic illness.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table for me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23:4-6
Vicki’s Bio:
I live in the lovely Pacific Northwest (Oregon) with my husband Jon, (when I'm not following him around the world, wherever his job takes us). After 40 years of marriage we now enjoy spending time with our five children, and look forward to our ninth grandchild, due Spring of 2014. I love to read and I am exploring my possible writing skills, looking forward to possibly being published someday. I am currently working on a book for young girls. I am also working on a book of my 'memoirs' from my breast cancer journey, to coincide with my 20 year survivor anniversary at the end of 2014. I look forward to seeing where God's direction takes me from there...
Vicki's Contacts:
Facebook Writing Page: Victory's Memories - VM
Blog Page: Where in the world is Jon and Vicki? (Still a work in progress)