17 March 2013

Interview with Margaret Brownley

Margaret Brownley

Margaret Brownley is a N.Y. Times Bestselling Author and the author of Waiting for Morning (Brides of Last Chance Ranch series) She also published a non-fiction book title Grieving God’s Way; the Lasting Path to Hope and Healing (Thomas Nelson 2012), written after the death of her son following a long illness. She has published 28 books, mostly historical romance.

Margaret, welcome to Overcoming With God.  We appreciate your willingness to share your testimony of overcoming with our readers. 

Would you tell us about the most difficult thing in your life you have had to overcome, with God’s help? T
hank you for letting me share.  As previously stated, my son died and I can’t begin to tell you what a painful, trying time that was for our family.  He was only twenty and just reaching the prime of life.
Six months after his death, I bumped into someone at the supermarket I hadn’t seen in awhile (actually I hadn’t seen anyone since the funeral).  She took one look at me and asked, “Aren’t you over it yet?”

I was stunned.  My first thought was that there was something wrong with me. But then I wondered what kind of person could get over the loss of a loved one so quickly?  More importantly, did I even want to be that person? 

I rushed home and started doing research on grief, starting with the Bible. What followed is hard to explain; for some reason I was driven. I read every grief book I could get my hands on, but that wasn’t all. I also attended grief groups and talked to dozens of people who had experienced a similar loss. My research paid off.   I gradually came to realize that grief was a miraculous healing tool from God designed to protect, heal, help us grow and become more like Him.  (How this healing tool works is explained in my book (www.grievinggodsway.com).

I firmly believe that God heals through our gifts and in my case that was my love of words and writing. I thought I was jotting down notes for my own benefit.  It never occurred to me that I was writing a book until a couple of hundred pages later. It’s a book I never wanted to write—and one I wish readers never had to read.  But we don’t always get to choose the direction of our lives and we just have to trust that God is leading the way.
Waiting for Morning

Disability friendliness: Is this latest release available in audio format or do you have any other works available on audio?  Do your e-books have audio capability? Do you have any in large print?
I’m happy to say that Waiting for Morning along with most of my books are available in large print and have audio capacity.  Grieving God’s Way is also available as an Audio book and CD.

In this latest work, do you have any topics useful for bibliotherapy, or therapeutic influence through reading about a disorder or situation?
In Waiting for Morning, the heroine’s brother is wheelchair-bound.  Molly blames herself for his condition and is determined to put his needs first, even if it means giving up her own happiness.  Blinded by grief and guilt, she fails to realize that her brother is not helpless and is quite capable of doing for himself.  He accuses her of seeing only the wheelchair and not the person.  It’s not until she learns to look at him through God’s eyes that healing begins and they are finally able to face the future with hope and courage.
 
CFP: Thank you Margaret for agreeing to answer these questions.  We at OWG want to express our sorrow that you have lost a precious son. I’ve heard one never gets over the loss of a child—you simply learn to live with the pain.
Dawn Comes Early

GIVEAWAYS: Margaret is generously giving away a copy of “Grieving God’s Way.”  Thank you, Margaret—we have a number of OWG Followers who have suffered a loss. Margaret is also giving away a copy of  “Waiting for Morning.” We are also giving away the choice of any of Margaret’s books this week, choice of format, to one of our commenters. 


51 comments:

  1. Thank you for sharing this with us, Margaret. I don't think we ever "get over it." God bless you. Joy Ross Davis

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    1. Joy,you're so right. You never do get over, but you do heal.It just takes a long time. Blessings to you, too!

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  2. I would love very much to win this give away thank you
    Shirley Blanchard
    jcisforme@aol.com

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  3. MARGARET welcome to OWG, I am so sorry to hear of the loss of your son, I have two sons and I cannot imagine losing one. Thank you for allowing God to use your grief to help others. What a blessing you are.

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    1. HI Teresa, thank you so much for your kind words. It sounds like you have been truly blessed. Please give your two sons a big hug for me.

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  4. MARGARET, thank you for the pleasure of your company all this week at OWG! I am so terribly sorry for your loss. I am amazed at what that thoughtless person at the grocery store said to you. There is nothing like a mother's love for her children and it isn't just something you ever "get over." God bless you~

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    1. Hi Diana, before losing my son, I never knew what to say to someone who lost a loved one. Now I know that the most comforting words are "I'm sorry" and "I came to help you cry."

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  5. MARGARET, You know you are near and dear to my heart! I appreciated your encouraging words after my daughter passed away. The things people say are perplexing. I had a woman tell me she knew exactly how I felt as her dog had died. Well...NOT! While I grant some people treat their pets like humans, the basic fact is, they're not. I just smiled and said thanks.

    I think I need to buy your book on grief. I would love to read more words from one of my favorite authors :)

    I'm really looking forward to Book 3 in The Brides of Last Chance Ranch! The cover looks amazing!!!

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    1. Hi Anne, your loss is more recent than mine and I really admire your strength and ability to reach out to others. Regarding pets: yes,someone said the same thing to me after I lost my son. You're a better person than I, because I didn't smile.

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    2. I have to say that had it been anyone other than who it was, I would not have smiled.

      It is only by God's grace and sustaining strength that I am able to reach out at all!!! I sure can't do it on my own.

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  6. Oh, my goodness! I am shocked at what the woman in the grocery store said! That is beyond comment. I am so sorry your son died at such a young age. I know your book on grief will be helpful to many people. Isn't it amazing how God worked to help you, but in writing the book you will be ministering to others?
    may_dayzee (at) yahoo (dot) com

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    1. Isn't that horrible, KAY? Someone else recently told me that about the loss of her mother--that someone said that to her. how weird. And insensitive.

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  7. Hi Margaret, I am truly sorry about your son. These things are always so hard to understand. But, so much better when we can lean on GOD, Can't imagine someone being so insensitive as to say what this person did. She must have not lost a loved one yet. It is never easy to get over. But, it does get easier as time goes on. As I've said before, I thank GOD for giving us memories. Thinking of the good times help keep us a lot, and forever in our hearts! Thanks for inviting Margaret, Teresa. Put me in to win a book. Bet her westerns are good..Not meaning that the other one isn't. I'm sure it helped you by writing it and will many others. Maxie mac262(at)me(dot)com Go OWG

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    1. Hi Maxie,
      Your sensitivity makes me think you've experienced losses in your own life. You're so right about memories; they truly are one of GOD's greatest gifts!

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  8. Sorry Carrie. Don't know where I got the idea it was Teresa doing this interview. You will have to forgive me. Had a senior moment there.. LOL Love you girl. Maxie OWG

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    1. MAXIE, Marian held the spot for me so it gets confusing. Good to see u here!

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  9. Margaret , So sorry for the lost of your son.. I have not given up a child so I can't say I know what you are going through. I would love a chance to win your books . Thanks for the contest. God's Blessing to you.
    Elizabeth
    lizd225(at)gmail(dot)com.

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    1. Elizabeth, thank you! I would love for you to win a book. Blessings back. :)

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  10. Thanks you so much for sharing Margaret. I lost a sister a few years back, and like others can't believe the lady at the grocery store! I think it was several years before I didn't think of my sister daily, and of course it was even harder on my Mom.

    pattymh2000(at)yahoo(dot)com

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    1. Patty, I'm so sorry about the loss of your sister. I know what you mean about thinking of a loved one daily (hourly!). Take care and God bless.

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  11. i love Margaret's books and I have recommend Her Grieving's God way
    I would love to win Waiting for morning

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    1. Debbie, thank you so much for recommending my book. I really appreciate it. God bless!

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  12. Just wanted to pop in and thank you all for your kind comments. Also want to thank Carrie and the OMG team for having me. What a great site this is! My prayers are with those of you who have lost loved ones and now have treasures in heaven. I honestly don't know how people get through grief without God leading the way. I wish I could send you all a book!

    God bless.

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  13. I have a family member who refuses to allow his wife to talk to me about the loss of unborn children since "there's nothing to mourn." I have to give it to him though, at least he's consistent in his views on unborn children are nothing and therefore abortion is nothing to justify--but still quite insensitive.

    I do believe I've been taught that if I haven't experienced the exact same loss and may be of some comfort, I'll simply say sorry and shut my mouth when someone talks about their grief.

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    1. Hi Melissa, Many men have trouble expressing grief verbally. This can put a terrible strain on a marriage.I hope his wife shares her feelings with others. That's what friends are for! :)

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    2. Whoops, I was unclear, it's the loss of my unborn children, but she's been instructed not to let me talk to her about it and to ignore me if I do and not lend any sympathy as he intends to do, since my loss is insignificant.

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    3. Oh, Melissa, I'm so sorry. I misunderstood. I hope you have other people in your life with whom you can share your pain. Your loss is great and you need to talk about it. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

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  14. I have not lost anyone as close to me as you did with your son. I can't imagine the heartbreak and grief.

    It truly is a blessing to know that God has guided you to write this book, even though you didn't realize it at the time. (I love how He works in mysteries ways)

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    1. Hi Cindi, yes, it is amazing how God works. Looking back,I now realize God always sent the right people in my life at the right. I might never have written that book had it not been for the women in the grocery store. Crazy, eh?

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  15. MARGARET, a big welcome to OWG and thank you so much for sharing your testimony with us!

    I have an (almost) 18 yr. old son who means the world to me and I can't even imagine ever getting over it if anything ever happened to him, let alone in six months!! I was just shocked to read that some people would say things like this! Thank you SO much for writing your book to share with and help people with this painful subject. I'm very sorry for your loss. God bless you.

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    1. Hi Noela,
      I'm so grateful to be here and to meet so many kind and loving people. God bless you and your son.

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  16. I don't even want to think about how horrendous & painful it would be to lose one of my children. Hearing about your loss Margaret makes me want to just grab my children for a hug.

    OWG

    marypres(AT)gmail(DOT)com


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    1. Mary, if I were there, I'd grab your children and hug them too! I have a tendency to do that! :)

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  17. Margaret, yes I have had a lot of losses, but never one of my children, Can't even imagine the heartache. Thank GOD. My parents, 5 of 7 siblings. my husband, and just this past AuG. a son-in-law. My daughter is still having a rough time, but moving slowly toward being better. It was so sudden, talking to him one minute, and he was gone the next. And, she was alone, bless heart. If I get your book, I will give it to her. I also lost a late in life baby at 2 mo. pregnant, and still carried it 2 mos. before having a D & C. Someone told me,"at least you didn't plan the baby." But, these things happen as you get my age. God has always been right there to help me through. GOD bless you in your writing. <3 I love the OWG girls, too! Maxie

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    1. Maxie, you certainly have had a lot of losses in your life. It also sounds as if you had your share of insensitive remarks. Planned or not, the loss of a baby is tragic. I pray your daughter continues to heal. God bless you and your family.

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  18. I've been wanting to read your fiction! shopgirl152nykiki(at)yahoo(dot)com

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  19. A great interview of a woman who is becoming a hero!
    I have never lost a child (I have 5 of them), however I lost my dad a little almost 2 years ago & I can't believe that much time as goe by--can't even imagine the loss of a child!
    I will be telling a friend about your book on grieving & try to make sure she get a copy of it. She lost the 2nd of 2 daughters (her only children) a little over a year ago, and I have watched the heartache she has gone thru. She was suffering from Depression from the loss of the 1st daughter (to leukemia), as was the older sister (I think it was about 2 years earlier), when she received that horrible call, that her 1st-born daughter had died in an auto accident, Somewhere around the same time, her husband decided he couldn't handle the depression she was going through, and he filed for divorce and also her best friend (whom she had gone into business with) decided that she no longer wanted to do business with her! So, she didn't lose one child, but two, a husband, a best friend and her job! Fortunately some of her oldest daughter's friends have stepped in and are helping her, including one, who invited her to become her roommate. She is truly becoming a Survivor of loss.
    Please enter me into the drawings. vmarney(at)hotmail(dot)com
    Vicki OWG

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    1. Vicki, my condolences for the loss of your father. It's always hard to say goodbye to a parent.

      My heart aches for your friend. Whenever I started feeling sorry for myself I heard about someone whose losses were far greater than mine. I can't imagine losing TWO children. Thank God she has people like you in her life.

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  20. I cannot begin to imagine your loss!
    Lisa
    deiselbuffs@yahoo.ca

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  21. I would love to win the book, "Grieving God's Way". We have a Grief support group at church and I would love to give this book to the church library.
    Thanks!
    Janet E.
    von1janet(at)gmail(dot)com

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    1. Hi Library Lady, if your church is interested in Grieving God's Way curriculum for grief groups, let me know. It's free.

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  22. Oh, Margaret, I cannot even imagine the pain of losing a child, and I am so very sorry it happened to you. But ... I rejoice in the fact that true to His Word, God has brought good from this heart-shattering experience by anointing you with a critically important ministry to those who grieve and need His touch at the most soul-wrenching time of their lives. The world is blessed to have a gifted writer such as yourself offering comfort and God's love on a very important issue.

    And, Carrie, as always -- your interviews are truly anointed as well, soul deep in their impact on people's lives.

    Hugs,
    Julie

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    1. Julie, what a beautiful and encouraging post. You truly have a way with words. Thank you and God bless.

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    2. I thank God I have not lost a child. And I thank Him that He has helped Margaret bear up under the loss, JULIE. Thanks for your kind words. We pray OWG will help others.

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  23. Thank you for your books, Margaret. I really enjoy your western romances.
    I'm sorry you had to go through the loss of your son. It was heart-wrenching enough for me when my teen son went to live with his dad a couple of years ago. That can't even begin to compare to the death of a son. I am thankful you used this experience to write a book on grief that will help many people going through similar losses. It is not something we just "get over," no matter who it is that has died. I liken it to having a physical wound. It heals in time, though sometimes the scab comes off and the healing has to begin again. However, we will always have the scar.
    Blessings to you.
    pmk56[at]sbcglobal[dot]net

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    1. Hi Pam K.
      I'm so glad you like my western romances. Thank you for your kind words. I know what you mean about a teen leaving home. When our youngest son left home at 18 to join the Marines, it nearly tore my heart out.

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  24. thanks for the chance to win one of Margaret's books

    ABreading4fun [at] gmail [dot] com

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  25. Apple Blossom,
    Thank you for taking the time to enter!
    Good luck

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